This is a stressful topic for me and at first I almost went all CAPS lock commenty in the comments of this Salon article, but instead I’ll take to my tumblr to mouth off like an internet gremlin:
The real reason why so many girls write about guys is that it is therapeutic.
Stories that tell the story of a relationship give the relationship a concreteness it might not have in real life.
Any time you write a story you are lending whatever you’re writing about an order, imposing upon it some sort of moral, or direction. Naturally, it helps to narrate a frustrating relationship as if it is its own self-contained story.
In this way, a girl can create an agency for herself, as a person outside of the relationship.
So a woman telling other women that they shouldn’t write about boys is bullshit.
I have written stories about boyz and I have written stories about other people who aren’t boyfriends.
The stories about boys are way way way easier to write. 100%.
It’s because it’s diary writing, no matter how experienced of a writer you are.
That is why, Lorraine Berry, so many students draw inspiration from the dudes they fall in love with. (COUGH)
Writing about relationships doesn’t make you weak.
Writing about boys is normal and fine and allowed.
It is a way to start writing good stuff.
“The rape joke is that you were crazy for the next five years, and had to move cities, and had to move states, and whole days went down into the sinkhole of thinking about why it happened. Like you went to look at your backyard and suddenly it wasn’t there, and you were looking down into the center of the earth, which played the same red event perpetually.”
Read this poem. Now.